Comments of the Week: Lots of Love

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Welcome back to another Comments of the Week!

This is the community showcase where fellow Dtoiders, such as yourselves, can read funny comments from other Dtoiders, such as yourselves. Since we all know how much we love ourselves, that means there’s lots of love in the air, so wave your hands like you just don’t care!

Whether you’ve been busy planning that special night for that special someone, or you simply need something to read to calm your nerves while you wait for the love of your life to frickin’ remember what day is today, then this is for you!

As always, comments are placed into three categories:

TRUTH: According to a survey, 180 million Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged every year.

LOL: I wonder how many V-cards are taken.

WUT?: Ladies, I’m offering my membership for $69 this year!

If you didn’t check out last week’s edition of Comments of the Week, then you can find out how big of a bitch my ex is right here. No, I’m totally not still thinking about her!

From Report: Titanfall 2 will include single-player mode

Dreamweaver: Bitches loves motherfucking mechs.

From Ubisoft deliberately keeping PC version of The Division ‘in check’ with consoles

Dreamweaver: I bet they ain’t got nothing on a Prius.

Dreamweaver: They’re the reason why I never beat Super Mario USA!

From Come watch Dark Souls III’s opening cinematic

Dreamweaver: Can’t we ever be en-raged?

From Clueless Gamer returns with guests for Doom

Dreamweaver: Who else is going to be blowing holes tonight? :3

From Precision platformer N++ headed to Steam

Dreamweaver: When “Fuck yes” just isn’t good enough.

From And the winner of the Games Journalism Award…not a games journalist!

Dreamweaver: He’ll never live that down.

He’ll probably never sit down either.

From Devs are already thinking about the next generation of consoles

Dreamweaver: We’re gonna remaster the remasters, yo.

From The newest Pokemon on the block is ‘Magiana’

Dreamweaver: It doesn’t mean what you think it means!

Dreamweaver: Try that sex position out for Valentine’s Day!

From Umbrella Corps unveils its Resident Evil 5 themed map

Dreamweaver: More like Call of Booty, judging from the dude on the left.

From Cliffy B: ‘I woulda f**ked up Silent Hills’

Dreamweaver: At least his last name doesn’t begin with a “D”.

From Pirating group 3DM had an internal meeting, decided ‘not to crack for a year’

Dreamweaver: Step on crack, the dealers will break yo momma’s back.

From Customize your Corrin before Fire Emblem Fates launches

Dreamweaver: Like the Kendrick Lamar song?

From Get to know Street Fighter V’s F.A.N.G better

Dreamweaver: No it doesn’t, The Last Airbender was a terrible movie!

Dreamweaver: Dammit, Perro! Your name’s not relevant!

From BioWare writer David Gaider moves to Beamdog

Dreamweaver: I’m surprised it took 56 weeks of Comments of the Week for someone to fall for that!

Dreamweaver: Come on, man, pay attention!

From The Humble Ubisoft Bundle adds Blood Dragon

Dreamweaver: Say that with a Russian accent!

From Don’t even bother booting up Destiny for the Crimson Days event

Dreamweaver: Chris Carter does kinda sound like the name of an action movie star. Like Chris Tucker playing Agent Carter in Rush Hour.

From Someone made Dark Souls’ Anor Londo in Minecraft

Dreamweaver: Considering how high up his character is in this screenshot, I doubt we can ever reach his level.

From American Truck Simulator has a hefty demo

Dreamweaver: Fuck, I wonder if it’s infectious

From Firewatch dev ‘super fu*king bummed’ about PS4 frame rate issues

Dreamweaver: It’s like a boring version of the Mexican Hat Dance.

From Activision says there will be a Destiny sequel in 2017

Dreamweaver: Gosh darn it, I say!

From Meet BrolyLegs, the competitive Street Fighter player who fights with his mouth

Dreamweaver: Stick to Metroids.

From Zelda looks right at home with an isometric art style

Dreamweaver: …Damn it, Isay.

From Knack 2? Is that you? Could it be true?

Dreamweaver: What would we do with the dog bone?

From You could be playing Red Dead Redemption on your Xbox One right now

Dreamweaver: Everyone knows Obama cancelled Firefly.

From Review: Firewatch

Dreamweaver: You technically get the satisfaction of giving Steven $20.

From Watch Pokemon: The First Movie online for free

Dreamweaver: Whoa, that’s pretty harsh for something that happened 17 years ago.

From Beware those Pokemon Go beta sign-up pages, they’re all scams

Dreamweaver: His penis is going to steal all the women away from him.

Dreamweaver: Sounds completely legit!

From Farewell, newest Super Smash Bros., you were the best

Dreamweaver: I hope he ate a lot of fiber.

From Kanye West reveals new game about his mother ascending to heaven

Dreamweaver: It’s so wrong, yet it’s so funny.

Kinda like me in bed.

From Overcooked is a cooperative cooking game on LSD

Dreamweaver: Ew, who the hell eats Frosted Mini-Wheats?

From Dung beetles, split-screen, and more added to ARK: Survival Evolved for Xbox One

Dreamweaver: That’s how you know someone’s ballin’.

From It takes a lot to make a stew

Dreamweaver: Who says Destructoid can’t be educational?

And that’s it for this edition! Now go snuggle up to that special someone before I have to do it myself. You know I will!

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