Castlevania movie earns another continue

Recommended Videos

Remember earlier this week when we told you that the Castlevania movie had been staked and was busy turning to ash and blowing into the wind? Well, it seems that was a bit premature. IGN (yeah, the same one as before) posted this story earlier that clarifies rumors of Paul W.S.(O.P.P.) Anderson’s departure by speaking directly to the walking abbreviation himself. To wit;

“Both Death Race and Castlevania are set up at Universal,” Anderson explains. “The studio wants to make both films, but obviously there is a scheduling conflict which we are trying to resolve. I am very passionate about Castlevania and whatever happens I will remain actively involved in my role as writer and producer.”

Thank god … ? I’m not sure we should all be celebrating the resurrection of this movie so quickly, as Paul W.S.(N-Double-O-P) Anderson is still only a few sessions of fellating Harvey Weinstein away from being Uwe Boll. As much as it pains me to do it, I predict this movie will disgust even the most hearty Castlevania fans, and The Lost Boys will remain the apex of vampire-related cinema.

(Editor’s Note: At 3am, Nex is both drunk and pretentious, and has an overly-excitable grasp of the evolving lexicon that is the English language. Don’t blame him, blame the Patron. — Nex)

About The Author
Earnest Cavalli
I'm Nex. I used to work here but my love of cash led me to take a gig with Wired. I still keep an eye on the 'toid, but to see what I'm really up to, you should either hit up my Vox or go have a look at the Wired media empire.
More Stories by Earnest Cavalli