There are quite a few entries in the Guinness World Records that many would consider superfluous, but no matter how ridiculous some of them may be, they always have something in common — objectivity. Everything can be measured, weighed, quantified, or otherwise reduced to a value that everyone can agree upon as accurate, barring any accusations of cheating or the like. At least, they used to. I don’t know when Guinness started running user polls, but that practice needs to stop yesterday.
For the Guinness World Records 2012 Gamer’s Edition book, 13,519 votes were collected to bring us the “definitive list of the greatest video game endings of all time.” By “definitive,” Guinness means not definitive at all by their own admission that “the list will cause heated debate.” The titles that dominate, which come almost exclusively from the last decade, don’t determine anything other than how much of a popularity contest these polls really are.
Call of Duty: Black Ops tops the list as supposedly having the greatest videogame ending ever. Oooooh! Zombies! Mind-blowing plot twist right there. Do the entries get any better further down the list? Well, #11 is Super Mario Bros. That game doesn’t even have an ending! The Princess just tells you to play hard mode! And Sonic Adventure 2 is just… wrong. You can check the full list below. Admittedly, some of the games have decent endings, but there is no rhyme or reason to the order. Seriously, this did not need to be a thing.
- Call of Duty: Black Ops
- Halo: Reach
- The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
- Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2
- God of War
- Red Dead Redemption
- Portal
- Metal Gear Solid 4
- Final Fantasy VII
- Heavy Rain
- Super Mario Bros.
- Pokemon Black and White
- Halo 3
- Halo: Combat Evolved
- Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
- Assassin’s Creed: Brotherhood
- Portal 2
- Grand Theft Auto IV
- Mass Effect 2
- Super Mario Galaxy 2
- Uncharted 2: Among Thieves
- Kingdom Hearts
- Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare
- Shadow of the Colossus
- Assassin’s Creed
- Assassin’s Creed II
- Metal Gear Solid
- Sonic the Hedgehog
- Super Mario Galaxy
- Mass Effect
- Kingdom Hearts II
- Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
- Sonic Adventure 2
- StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty
- BioShock
- Gears of War 2
- Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
- Fallout 3
- inFamous
- New Super Mario Bros. Wii
- The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
- Super Metroid
- Half-Life 2: Episode Two
- Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II
- Call of Duty: World at War
- The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
- Crysis 2
- Ratchet & Clank: A Crack in Time
- Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
- Resident Evil 4