If you’ve ever had trouble in the past understanding the age ratings of a video game, then you’re a f*cking idiot. Unsurprisingly, Britain is full of these arseholes, so UK games will soon be introducing a “Traffic Light” labeling system to help moronic parents understand videogames without taxing their mental reserves. Now they can save precious brainpower for important stuff, like thinking about Big Brother.
As you might have gathered, the system uses the red, yellow and green colors of a traffic light in order to provide a visual aid the mentally incompetent. A green label means the game will be fine for kids, a yellow calls for the long-dead art of parental guidance, while a red means that it’s for adults. Before this, parents were forced to decide for themselves whether an 18-rated game was suitable for their 7-year-old child. Thank God for progress!
The system borrows from a currently existing one that rates food in a similar manner, based on how healthy it is. Publishing body ELSPA agrees with the new system, believing it will help parents become more informed.
Personally, I expect parents to ignore this, just like they ignore everything else, because they are either as thick as pigsh*t or too weak to tell their children that they can’t have Gears of War. Videogames have had massive, impossible-to-miss “18” certificates on them for years and that hasn’t helped. I appreciate the sentiment of this move, but it’s likely to be lost on a fair few UK parents.
